The Duty to Waste Time in a Meaningful Way

The Duty to Waste Time in a Meaningful Way

I received a jury summons and dutifully responded and waited until yesterday to see if I would indeed be needed.  As it turns out, my group was not.  I considered going to work as usual but immediately dismissed the thought because my clients were already scheduled to be in the capable hands of my coworkers and I knew my P.I.C. (partner in crime) would be disappointed in me if I didn't take the opportunity to kick back today and relax.  It's not even that I think the place would come crashing down without me.  I might smile a little as I think about the little ways they would miss me because I'm pretty sure they're not entirely aware of the things I do.  I confess that I derive a sense of satisfaction from being the glue that keeps things together and the go-to girl.  But I can't say megalomaniac is among the list of my faults.   

As soon as I made the decision to not go in I started worrying and obsessing about what to do instead.  This is a golden opportunity that doesn't present itself often, in fact almost never.  Worrying about what I might do is a bit of an understatement.  I lost sleep last night.  I had nightmares.  Let's pause for a minute for a word from ....

"Maureen, you're a nut!"  

Thanks, Capt. O! All of this stuff makes perfect sense in my head until I say them out loud.  I'm so duty driven and work oriented that I'm at a loss when I'm not working on a project or towards a goal.  I wanted to be able to report that at the end of the day, my time was well spent.  I started the day by sleeping in.  I had a great breakfast, read the paper and had that second cup of coffee I'm always thinking about as I dash out the door every day.  I spent a lot of the day surfing around the internet pursuing different interests.  One quest was the search for a non work related book to take with me on my ski trip.  I wanted so much for it to be "meaningful and worth the time if it wasn't going to be work related" that I ended up closing down Barnes & Noble last night in search of the perfect tome.  I left empty handed..... Shut up, Capt. Obvious!  I know it!

Granted, it took me the better part of the day, but I finally felt the intense pressure I was putting on myself regarding leisure time.  

lei·sure  

/ˈlēZHər/

Noun Free time. Use of free time for enjoyment.

Synonyms spare time - leisure time - ease

I don't think I get enough of the stuff!  It was then that I grabbed a hunk of cookie dough and drew a bubble bath.  That my friend, is the meaning of leisure time!  My resolution is to carve out more of the stuff for myself so next time it won't be such a monumental happening that I wind up stressing about unwinding!  I'm going to go make a list of leisure activities so I'll be prepared......

I said, Shut up!, Captain Obvious and stop shaking your head at me!